Culture For The Non-Cultured

Dear Tourists,

God bless you.

Tourists, even in a good economy, you are vital. In an economy such as this, you may just be the arms that pull New York out of financial hell.

Please, treat yourself and a busload of your best buddies to Four Seasons. Pay full price for Broadway shows. Buy a Coach bag or ten (on 5th Avenue, not the Chinatown variety).

We New Yorkers are thankful. So, ask your directions. Give us natives your cameras and we will capture your memories so you can visually spread the word about our fair city. Walk as S-L-OW-L-Y as you please.
***
(When you New Yorkers get all impatient with the slow walkers, just remember: tourists cannot SPEND if they speedwalk with their head down!)